You can't reach goals on your own. Here's why.

Goals are a bit cliche, aren’t they? It seemed to be a running theme in school and even more so when I went to college for Fitness and Health. Often part of assignments and courses, I didn’t actually find goals to be motivating or exciting. It was something I was taught to work towards and never something I really wanted to do. I went through the motions and got the schoolwork done, but when it came to actually set goals, I didn’t really follow through.

Fast forward to real adult life with bills and responsibilities, I’ve come to realize  that in order to achieve the things I want, those goals need to be made and I actually need to make them happen. Without goals, we are just going through the motions, allowing life to happen to us. And while that may seem like “enough”, I actually think that living that way takes away from any ambition we have or growth that God may have for us. If we don’t reach for more, how will we achieve more?

For a long time, I didn’t want to set goals for fear of failure. Why would I set myself up for failure, if I could just avoid it altogether? I felt this way until I understood that no one was coming to rescue me. No one was coming to wake me up on time or slap the Doritos out of my hand. No one was coming to hand me a house or magically make my back pain go away. No one was going to offer me a dream job or a healthier body. I was the one responsible for my progress and my results. Me.

But then how do you start? It seems like a lot of pressure to take it all on ourselves, doesn’t it? I have to set the goal, take the steps, AND achieve it?  Sounds simple. But I can tell you after years of goal setting, goal failing and disappointment, it isn’t effective. I think the key difference is not WHAT we do on our journey to our goals, but HOW we use our resources, and more specifically, WHO we use as our resources. 

It’s amazing to think of all the things we have accomplished in our lives so far. Perhaps you survived a medical or emotional trauma. Perhaps you have some significant education or accomplishments. I imagine you have some beautiful friendships and a family. Not a single one of these things was done alone. Using your community, and being a part of a community is not only key to growth and making your way through life, it’s also imperative. We have been given beautiful help in life through people and relationships. Why would reaching goals not require the same resource?

How did I get started?

Some of my biggest growth came through coaching and mentorship. In 2019, I hired a coach and I mentored under another. My coach has since helped me walk through some big and some smaller day-to-day challenges. She has helped me to see what I valued and how I could make my dreams a reality. She has shown me how to celebrate even the smallest wins. Through working with my coach, I have felt encouraged and empowered to move forward, even when I doubted myself. One of the biggest takeaways: Action is the foundational key to all success.

Around the same time, I had taken a job with another coach, working for her women’s health business. Through seeing her business in action, I have learned that not all goals had to be huge. If you want to run a marathon, you need to start with a 5k race. Before that, you should be running in shorter chunks to build up endurance. Before running, you’ll need to walk. Before you go for a walk, you’ll need to put on your shoes.

Both of these coaches have taught me that small steps lead to big progress. Both coaches have held me accountable so that I follow through.

If I look back at my life… there were goals that I accomplished, I just didn’t write them down. In fact, several years ago, I did something pretty amazing. At 20 years old, I moved to Nicaragua to teach English. I saved my money and took a course to teach English as a second language. I got myself back and forth to Toronto to attend the course. I called friends to stay with them so I could save some money when I was in the city. I got my passport, vaccinations, and flight booking. I talked to people along the way to learn from them and prepare myself about the language, culture, health, and other travel considerations. Many people encouraged me along the way, celebrating my ambition and propelling me forward. My church even hosted collections to support my endeavor. 

It took months to plan, prepare and save for a 10-month stay in a foreign country with a host family. Then when I was there, I didn’t have a plan. I was blessed with some amazing new friends who cared for me and taught me how to navigate my new home. 

I didn’t write that goal down, but I sure took the steps to make it happen. Looking back, none of it would have been possible without so many people along the way to help me. The people who spent time talking to me, serving me, and the many generous supporters who helped to fund that journey. So much of that experience is a result of the love and support of the community that God blessed me with.

Are you stuck in your goal? Try these journaling prompts:

What is your big goal? What are some small steps that you can take to move you closer? 

Who can you connect with to get answers or help move you closer to your goal?

Reading this blog may give you a glimmer of hope in your circumstances and when you’re ready, you can move forward. If you’re ready, take that first step and book a no obligation call! CLICK HERE